Funny Car Situations

Word of warning - these observations by no means may be funny to anyone but me....On that note, I begin..


Ok - funny situation number 1: Anyone who is "attempting" to "work" on their car before, during or after work. This situation does not apply to construction workers, mechanics, or - just about anybody who works with any sort of a tool that is not a computer - so anyone who generally has to dress nice and doesn't get dirty at work. It is hilarious to see co-workers out there adding more oil, coolant, clutch fluid, brake fluid. Why? Let's face it - if you need to do that stuff to your car, you need to just get it fixed! Cars these days don't burn oil like the old days - admittedly I never had an old car that did this - but I've heard the stories! Anyway, inside of engine bays are usually dirty, unless you JUST bought the car - and to see co-workers out there in their pleats and short-sleeved button up collared shirts is just amusing. You and I both know they are going to come back to their desk with a giant black streak across their leg or arm. To get right down to it though - usually these kinds of people really have no clue what they are doing.

Number 2: I might catch a bunch of crap for this one - but so be it...(Generally) Guys who stand around and look at new car engine bays! This is funny for many reasons, but the first - have you actually seen the inside of a new car engine bay? There are so many plastic covering pieces that it makes joan rivers and michael jackson look like minimalists. (I'll be here all week folks - don't forget to tip your waitress) Honestly though, the engines "now-a-days" are so obfuscated with seemingly unnecessary amounts of plastic that no longer does it resemble an engine. So, these self-proclaimed cars guys are now looking a new car engine that, without tools to remove the plastic bits, is just black and silver with the car makers logo! That IS PIMP! I shall take it one step further and say that without any engine modifications done, an engine is an engine is an engine - seen one, you've seen them all. The obvious exception to the rule is any show car (new or old) or any classic car engine. Show cars have stuff done to them, turbos, superchargers, flashy chrome, color coordinated with the rest of the car. Sometimes a show car might really surprise everyone, like a big V12 inside a civic - might be dumb and pointless, but it took a lot of work to make that fit.

And finally, number 3 anyone on the side of the road with car problems who has their hood up. Having car trouble is the absolute worst! Almost everyone has experienced it, and given the choice, I am sure most people would rather sit through a 24 hour viewing session of Bill O'Reilly than have car trouble.....HAHAHA - ok that was too much, I'd still take car trouble. But seriously, car trouble sucks. However, what makes things funny is to have car trouble but be stuck on the side of the road, looking at the engine with no tools. You're not going to fix it - you cant even begin to troubleshoot - what are you doing?!?! Call AAA or a tow truck and take it somewhere. If you're that mechanically inclined and know how to fix it, that's great - but if the tools aren't with you, you just look like a jackass. It's like those same people who try to take pictures in the dark with a point and shoot camera - you don't want to use your flash, but you also don't have a tripod for the 1+ seconds the shutter is open - either way, the picture looks like crap, and your car is still broken.

Have other funny car situations? Post in the comments!