Word of warning - these observations by no means may be funny to anyone but me....On that note, I begin..
Ok - funny situation number 1: Anyone who is "attempting" to "work" on their car before, during or after work. This situation does not apply to construction workers, mechanics, or - just about anybody who works with any sort of a tool that is not a computer - so anyone who generally has to dress nice and doesn't get dirty at work. It is hilarious to see co-workers out there adding more oil, coolant, clutch fluid, brake fluid. Why? Let's face it - if you need to do that stuff to your car, you need to just get it fixed! Cars these days don't burn oil like the old days - admittedly I never had an old car that did this - but I've heard the stories! Anyway, inside of engine bays are usually dirty, unless you JUST bought the car - and to see co-workers out there in their pleats and short-sleeved button up collared shirts is just amusing. You and I both know they are going to come back to their desk with a giant black streak across their leg or arm. To get right down to it though - usually these kinds of people really have no clue what they are doing.
Number 2: I might catch a bunch of crap for this one - but so be it...(Generally) Guys who stand around and look at new car engine bays! This is funny for many reasons, but the first - have you actually seen the inside of a new car engine bay? There are so many plastic covering pieces that it makes joan rivers and michael jackson look like minimalists. (I'll be here all week folks - don't forget to tip your waitress) Honestly though, the engines "now-a-days" are so obfuscated with seemingly unnecessary amounts of plastic that no longer does it resemble an engine. So, these self-proclaimed cars guys are now looking a new car engine that, without tools to remove the plastic bits, is just black and silver with the car makers logo! That IS PIMP! I shall take it one step further and say that without any engine modifications done, an engine is an engine is an engine - seen one, you've seen them all. The obvious exception to the rule is any show car (new or old) or any classic car engine. Show cars have stuff done to them, turbos, superchargers, flashy chrome, color coordinated with the rest of the car. Sometimes a show car might really surprise everyone, like a big V12 inside a civic - might be dumb and pointless, but it took a lot of work to make that fit.
And finally, number 3 anyone on the side of the road with car problems who has their hood up. Having car trouble is the absolute worst! Almost everyone has experienced it, and given the choice, I am sure most people would rather sit through a 24 hour viewing session of Bill O'Reilly than have car trouble.....HAHAHA - ok that was too much, I'd still take car trouble. But seriously, car trouble sucks. However, what makes things funny is to have car trouble but be stuck on the side of the road, looking at the engine with no tools. You're not going to fix it - you cant even begin to troubleshoot - what are you doing?!?! Call AAA or a tow truck and take it somewhere. If you're that mechanically inclined and know how to fix it, that's great - but if the tools aren't with you, you just look like a jackass. It's like those same people who try to take pictures in the dark with a point and shoot camera - you don't want to use your flash, but you also don't have a tripod for the 1+ seconds the shutter is open - either way, the picture looks like crap, and your car is still broken.
Have other funny car situations? Post in the comments!
6.18.2009
6.04.2009
I'll get to the camping pictures later...
I'm stuck at a bit of a crossroads...On one hand I love my car...LOVE IT...I also appreciate automobiles, such as Ferrari (and other high end exotics), that have way too much horsepower and get 12mpg...Oh man, they are beautiful, sound amazing and go REALLY fast...
Which is why I have such a hard time coming to grips with the global environment. Things are changing - and at the current rate, for the worse. The fiancee and I were talking the other night and the issue isn't necessarily on the consumer, you and me - the issue deals with law makers and corporations. These guys are the ones with capital that can actually make a difference. I don't have $50 billion sitting around to donate to research, hell, I don't even have $25,000 sitting around to go solar for my condo. (Let's ignore the fact that our completely stupid and boneheaded home owners association would never approve) - The issue is with people afraid of change - and the people who can make a change, not willing or claiming they "can't".
People have always been afraid of change - back from Christianity and Lutherans, the Jews and Muslims having fought for centuries, WWI, WWII (basically ALL wars), slavery, blacks/whites, etc. etc. etc. etc. (I could do the "etc." thing forever here). I'm not trying to make this a religious thing (it's not) - so I'll throw out other examples to lighten the mood for a minute, Bone Thugs n Harmony and 3-6 Mafia? That better? Probably not, Eminem and NSYNC, Backstreet boys, Will Smith, Lethal, Ja Rule, everybody at the source magazine,..well, nearly everybody? Haha - no, that isn't better...United States and...everybody...damn! Tupac and Biggie, OSU and Michigan, USC and UCLA....aaahhh the insanity...
Back on point - people just don't get along - the people and the government can't even find middle ground on ANYTHING! Irrespective of your views on many issues (abortion, church/state separation, education, health care, middle east, energy, gun control, immigration, drugs, tax reform, etc) both groups of people on both sides (or many sides) can never find a working, middle ground solution. Everybody thinks they are entitled to a piece of the pie, but more importantly, the other side is "wrong". This isn't solely a USA thing - this is a human race, as a society, issue. Anyway, what I am getting at is this - the USA alone (any country alone) cannot solve this global environment issue alone. We need coordination and cooperation globally to solve this potential mess. Individual states cannot change the globe - but I do respect state legislature for, quite possibly only on the surface to appease some of their citizens, trying to make changes - you go Cali, you go Colorado!
But what about my H2, or what about my Jeep, or what about ME ME ME ME ME...
There is the issue - we need to stop thinking about "me" and start thinking about "us". I am not immune from this - I, just like everyone, have personal agendas, and don't think outside the box - hell, this post proves just that, but maybe if I can reach a few, you can reach a few, and so it begins. Admittedly, it's a bit of a pipe dream that a stupid blog post can make real change (I know it isn't possible) - but I guess I just had to get this off my chest. To further expand the "me" notion is to look at our government, and large, private corporations. The "me" is still a single conglomerate only looking out for number 1. The government recently spent another $30 billion on bailout money to freaking GM! There is a reason that company blew and is so deep in the hole. Instead of giving that money to a company who doesn't care about really making a change (wow, they have 1 prototype gas/electric car...) they could have given that money to companies to actually develop clean technology or give it GM but tell them they aren't making cars anymore - the same people at GM who used to assemble car parts, can now be used to assemble wind turbines, or solar panels. That money could have been put to use for massive public transportation initiatives in cities that have terrible infrastructure (outside of NY, Boston, Chicago, DC, Portland to name a few) - nearly EVERY city in the USA. The GM workers could go to building new bio-diesel buses, or all electric buses, trains, subways - etc. Or to a bunch of college research departments to figure out Hydrogen energy (or something else totally renewable and clean that hasn't been developed or thought of yet).
These aren't new ideas, many other, smarter people, are hard at work at this issue - but our "leaders" (government officials, business CEOs, law and policy makers) aren't looking out for anyone or anything but the bottom line - money. We can't drill our way out of this problem - it's going to take a new way of thinking and a new way of living - but all it will take is one generation. While the decisions will be hard, and the initial adopters will face some difficult times, this problem can easily be solved within a few years.
One person making a whole bunch of changes does not do a whole lot, but a whole lot of people making small changes does...
WOW - that was longer and a bigger complain-fest than I originally set out to write up - haha, oh well...it was nice to write it all out...
Which is why I have such a hard time coming to grips with the global environment. Things are changing - and at the current rate, for the worse. The fiancee and I were talking the other night and the issue isn't necessarily on the consumer, you and me - the issue deals with law makers and corporations. These guys are the ones with capital that can actually make a difference. I don't have $50 billion sitting around to donate to research, hell, I don't even have $25,000 sitting around to go solar for my condo. (Let's ignore the fact that our completely stupid and boneheaded home owners association would never approve) - The issue is with people afraid of change - and the people who can make a change, not willing or claiming they "can't".
People have always been afraid of change - back from Christianity and Lutherans, the Jews and Muslims having fought for centuries, WWI, WWII (basically ALL wars), slavery, blacks/whites, etc. etc. etc. etc. (I could do the "etc." thing forever here). I'm not trying to make this a religious thing (it's not) - so I'll throw out other examples to lighten the mood for a minute, Bone Thugs n Harmony and 3-6 Mafia? That better? Probably not, Eminem and NSYNC, Backstreet boys, Will Smith, Lethal, Ja Rule, everybody at the source magazine,..well, nearly everybody? Haha - no, that isn't better...United States and...everybody...damn! Tupac and Biggie, OSU and Michigan, USC and UCLA....aaahhh the insanity...
Back on point - people just don't get along - the people and the government can't even find middle ground on ANYTHING! Irrespective of your views on many issues (abortion, church/state separation, education, health care, middle east, energy, gun control, immigration, drugs, tax reform, etc) both groups of people on both sides (or many sides) can never find a working, middle ground solution. Everybody thinks they are entitled to a piece of the pie, but more importantly, the other side is "wrong". This isn't solely a USA thing - this is a human race, as a society, issue. Anyway, what I am getting at is this - the USA alone (any country alone) cannot solve this global environment issue alone. We need coordination and cooperation globally to solve this potential mess. Individual states cannot change the globe - but I do respect state legislature for, quite possibly only on the surface to appease some of their citizens, trying to make changes - you go Cali, you go Colorado!
But what about my H2, or what about my Jeep, or what about ME ME ME ME ME...
There is the issue - we need to stop thinking about "me" and start thinking about "us". I am not immune from this - I, just like everyone, have personal agendas, and don't think outside the box - hell, this post proves just that, but maybe if I can reach a few, you can reach a few, and so it begins. Admittedly, it's a bit of a pipe dream that a stupid blog post can make real change (I know it isn't possible) - but I guess I just had to get this off my chest. To further expand the "me" notion is to look at our government, and large, private corporations. The "me" is still a single conglomerate only looking out for number 1. The government recently spent another $30 billion on bailout money to freaking GM! There is a reason that company blew and is so deep in the hole. Instead of giving that money to a company who doesn't care about really making a change (wow, they have 1 prototype gas/electric car...) they could have given that money to companies to actually develop clean technology or give it GM but tell them they aren't making cars anymore - the same people at GM who used to assemble car parts, can now be used to assemble wind turbines, or solar panels. That money could have been put to use for massive public transportation initiatives in cities that have terrible infrastructure (outside of NY, Boston, Chicago, DC, Portland to name a few) - nearly EVERY city in the USA. The GM workers could go to building new bio-diesel buses, or all electric buses, trains, subways - etc. Or to a bunch of college research departments to figure out Hydrogen energy (or something else totally renewable and clean that hasn't been developed or thought of yet).
These aren't new ideas, many other, smarter people, are hard at work at this issue - but our "leaders" (government officials, business CEOs, law and policy makers) aren't looking out for anyone or anything but the bottom line - money. We can't drill our way out of this problem - it's going to take a new way of thinking and a new way of living - but all it will take is one generation. While the decisions will be hard, and the initial adopters will face some difficult times, this problem can easily be solved within a few years.
One person making a whole bunch of changes does not do a whole lot, but a whole lot of people making small changes does...
WOW - that was longer and a bigger complain-fest than I originally set out to write up - haha, oh well...it was nice to write it all out...
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)